Although the UNC Monday night forum is not for rum, Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar in the last one declared: "I am afraid of no one except God!" And since Kamla does have a reputation as a spirituous woman, this may account for her Dutch courage on several curious events in the People's Partnership administration over the past 30 months.
For example, the Prime Minister has never explained why she promoted Reshmi Ramnarine to head the Strategic Services Agency and then did a 360 degrees when the media broke the story. Now we know that it was God who told her not to tell us anything, saying in Ecclesiastes 1:18, "He that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow." As a compassionate and caring Prime Minister, Kamla didn't want the citizens of Trinidad and Tobago to know why she elevated a clerk to a security chief since, like sex on the beach or a one night stand that happens between the sheets, we'd be sorry. But we all know that Kamla is caring and compassionate, because she said so last Monday while explaining why she let Dr Wayne Kublalsingh nearly starve to death. And, while some people may feel that it was her PR adviser Ernie Ross who instructed her to call Dr Kublalsingh "Mr Kublalsingh" throughout her spirit-filled speech, it is God who said that "If any man among you seem wise in this world, let him become a fool" (Corinthians 3:18); which is why you have to scotch these PhDs from Oxford University.
Then there was the three-month State of Emergency which ended one year ago, just in time for people to celebrate the wine of Carnival. The SoE wasn't called, as many citizens believe, because Kamla was frightened about trade unions marching, or assassins plotting, or puncheon running out. It was because Allah himself said, "Those who disbelieved and denied our revelations, for them will be a shameful doom" (Surah 22, verse 57), which is why 8,178 persons who looked like PNM supporters were arrested during the emergency.
As Kamla knows, criticism of her administration is the same as blasphemy, since God says, "Let every person be subject to the governing authorities; for there is no authority except from God, and those authorities that exist have been instituted by God" (Romans 13:1). But former journalist turned professional propagandist Andy Johnson has identified those PNM newspaper columnists who drink a martini daily and continually deny the good works which the People's Partnership are doing, such as helping people who have a mudslide. But, since Kamla represents Bhagavan, like a brown cow or any colour, all UNC sycophants are doing God's work by praising Kamla since He points out in the Bhagavadgita that "Those who fix their minds on my form and are always engaged in worshipping me in great faith will attain perfection".
So that the non-National-Award-getting journalists who caused the Government to repeal Section 34 have sinned by defying Kamla's, and hence God's, will. First of all, God in the Bhagavadgita says, "Even if one commits the most abominable act, it is holy if done in worship." So Kamla and her cabal did nothing wrong by creating Section 34, since nobody in the cabinet is a grasshopper and the Prime Minister can punch above her weight. Also, God explained what to do in this very situation in 1Corinthians 7:29, saying that "The appointed time has grown short", which was why Section 34 had to be proclaimed early in order to help "those who buy as though they had no possessions, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it". Kamla must have interpreted this as a prophecy about Ish and Steve, and knew that their troubles could not have been fixed with just a screwdriver and a rusty nail.
Moreover, in Surah 68, verse 20, God says, "Allah has promised much treasure that you will take, given to you in advance, and kept men's hands from you, that this may be a sign for the faithful, and that He may guide you on the right path." This is proof that the $7.2 billion Point Fortin Highway is on the right route, and that God wants the UNC's friends and family to benefit financially from it. How much proof? I would say about 40 per cent.
Finally, when Kamla spends $868,000 of taxpayers' funds to carry her sister Vidwatie on a trip to India, or $3,000 per helicopter ride from Port of Spain to San Fernando, or $5,000 on Louis Vuitton boots, she is only following God's words in Ecclesiastes 8:15, which says, "A man hath no better thing to do under the sun than to eat, and to drink, and be merry." These are the principles which T&T's politicians have always followed, because all of them believe God can make a hurricane, an earthquake, and a hairy virgin.