Story Created:
Sep 21, 2012 at 11:03 PM ECT
Story Updated:
Sep 21, 2012 at 11:03 PM ECT
I am asking the question as a result of a recent conversation with someone who proceeded to tell me that in their view it was. The two important words in my last statement are "their view" and so it is when answering such a question, the views and opinions vary based upon personal experiences. I shudder to think that anyone answering such a question could be guided by anything other than their own experiences. Certainly, I've heard others stated that sex is overrated but interestingly never from a man.
One could argue that if you have had the unfortunate experience of only 'bad' sexual encounters you might think that sex is overrated and vice versa, if you have had only great sexual experiences, it is probably not a matter of being overrated but perhaps one of not being able to get enough.
Women and men tend to have different views on sex. Most women when compared to men attach deeper feelings of intimacy and emotional connections to sex, whereas most of us, men, view sex as a highly pleasurable fulfilling experience void of that deep emotional connection if any.
For those who view sex as overrated, there could be another reason apart from their own physical experiences which led them to that belief. If you are in a relationship and your significant other seems to be only interested in sex to the exclusion of the other components of a relationship, then it is feasible that you can become disinterested in sex. You can view the experience as a negative of your relationship because rather than being out enjoying each other's company and engaging in non-sexual activities, your significant other prefers being at home getting into your pants whenever they feel the need. Such behaviour can validate the saying, "Too much of any/good thing is a bad thing." This is a perspective that makes sense particularly for individuals seeking a balanced relationship, too much sex can become a turn off rather than a turn on.
At the other end of the spectrum, there are individuals for whom such a question/thought is unfathomable. They not only enjoy sex but have the right balance in their relationship or at least they are not complaining about getting too much or too little. Still further along the spectrum of different views on sex are the individuals who derive more pleasure from pleasuring themselves. For such rare individuals, sex, particularly with others is overrated. I am not about to call anyone deviant because as with everything in life we do have extremities where individuals can be found at both ends.
Your response to the question posed by this article would most likely be loaded with your own bias, not that it is a bad thing, if you understand that your perspective does not trump all others. I have long learned that when it comes to questions involving human behaviour and feelings the answers and responses are subjective — very subjective.
Hence, the issue of whether or not sex is overrated depends on who is answering. Sure we can put together surveys and analyse the varied responses etc… but what matters most is how sex — good, bad, too much, or too little — affects you and your relationship and what you can do to find the right balance.
e-mail: welseyallan@ymail.com or join me on facebook
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