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Uncomfortable relationship questions

By Allan

In a relationship, communication is the key; if there is no communication or very little, eventually, like a neglected plant, the relationship wilts and dies. Unfortunately, communicating with your partner is not always as simple as one would think and for various reasons. Some individuals, by nature, have difficulty communicating or expressing themselves, some clam up depending upon the topic yet others deliberately don't communicate, preferring to keep it all inside.

However, before you get into a relationship there are some reality questions you might need to ask. Of course, if you are planning on marrying someone it behooves you to know as much as you possibly can about that person. Here are a few uncomfortable (to some) questions:

What is your credit score or do you have good credit? While not anticipating a marriage being called off or a relationship not being initiated because of your partner's low or bad credit score it is important that you know; particularly if you are going into a joint/shared financial situation. If you have great credit do you want to risk having bad credit because of love? Love does not pay the bills. The point is you would both need to deal with this issue in a realistic manner.

How many sexual partners have you had? Not everyone wants to tell and not everyone wants to be with someone whose count is high (relative number). Some individuals want to know for various reasons: to judge your past and to predict, correctly or not, if you are likely to cheat. If it matters to you ask but keep an open mind and remember some people can and do change.

Do you have a criminal record? You certainly want to find out if your potential mate has a criminal record or has been to prison. If you weren't informed of this there are many unpleasant circumstances under which you can find out and that's without digging. For example, if you know someone who can hire your partner but during the hiring process your partner's criminal record is uncovered then it can be embarrassing to you.

Do you have or have you ever contracted an STD? People are not always honest and there's nothing fun or loving about contracting an STD from someone who deliberately withheld that information from you.

Questions about a person's physique may be awkward so be careful when asking such. This is an area of questioning I suggest you be tactful.

Always remember that the person who is going to be in the relationship is you; not your friends, family, church members or associates. As such you have every right to ask the questions that matters to you. Naturally, the person you are asking the questions has a choice in answering. I do believe that the person who wants to be with you will not be offended by your questions or hide anything from you. It's pretty straight-forward; you have questions to which you'd like honest answers.

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