Tools

Where Women Ambush Men

THE TROBRIAND ISLANDS, NEW GUINEA: THEIR CULTURE OF SEX

By By Nicole S Farrell

He can be all yours… No one will condemn you if you literally take him and do as you please… He surely will not report you to the police for 'assaulting' him and he will not fight back or protest.

Yes, ladies, this is reality – for some women. First, don your 'truth cap'. Have you ever seen a guy and had a thought like, "Hmm… If I only get you alone eh, boy…!" C'mon, admit it! We do it! You saw him at the mall, on the street (not a vagrant though) or at an event and you wanted him to be more than eye candy; you wanted to him to melt… ALRIGHT!

Well, there is a way you can literally 'snag' a man! That is if you're from…New Guinea! (Sorry if I burst your bubble). Years ago, I read an article in a magazine that talked about women who were legally allowed to target random men for their sexual pleasure. Over time, I lost the magazine and couldn't remember where this amazing tradition occurred. Finally, after several Google searches, there it was!

You see, there is a place in New Guinea which was known as The Trobriand Islands but is now officially known as the Kiriwina Islands. (I won't tell you what I changed that name to!). It is actually nicknamed "Islands of Love".

Apparently, the annual yam festival is not just about well, yams. Sure, the yam is 'king' during this time as competition reigns between villages for the title of 'tokwaibagula' ('good gardener') but it is also a time that sex rules. Women are permitted by their paramount chief to capture men and have their way with them, as in assault them sexually. A native islander will say that she can 'rep' (rape) the men!

The women lie in wait in the bushes (it is rainforest heaven there) and ambush a man who might be walking to work or awaiting transportation. The only rule I read about is that the man cannot be a member of the woman's tribe/village; it's always a man from another tribe/village.

Some males who had been assaulted twice, said that they got over the initial shock and actually enjoyed it (what a surprise!). The only adverse part of this ritual is that if a male couldn't 'perform', the women could urinate on him…and bite off his eyebrows…and eyelashes. This act would surely provoke ridicule from fellow villagers.

The festival time is considered a very dangerous period for a man to be out alone so men would usually go out in groups – just in case. Hey, the defense for 'doing it' in the bushes — making love was supposed to bring fertility to the crops. By the way, it has been said that the Trobrianders were of the opinion that there was no correlation between sex and conception (too long to explain!).

With this female dominance, I decided to research some more information on the culture surrounding females on the Island.

Pre-adolescent children are permitted to engage in erotic games with each other and adopt sexual behaviours and attitudes. Within a few years, they begin to have sex and change partners often, acts that are not only allowed but encouraged!

It is not unusual for a teenaged girl to sleep with many boys as this was a good practice to determine who would make a good husband. In order to ensure that a boy married you, you just had to ensure that both of you were together when the sun rose the following morning! Girls were known to use underhand tactics to ensure the guy stayed put until the prescribed hour. Who can blame them?

According to an article by one Isabella Tree, in the Trobriand Islands, there is no traditional marriage ceremony. Once the female is at her guy's house after sunrise, they would wait together in the morning for the bride's mother to bring them cooked yams. Once they eat together, the marriage is officially recognised. The now married couple would eat together for about a year and then go back to eating separately..

A Trobriand couple wishing to marry, could also display their interest by not only sleeping together but spending time together and staying with each other for several weeks. The girl's parents approve of the couple when a girl accepts a gift from a boy. After that, the girl moves to the boy's house, eats her meals there and accompanies her husband all day. Word subsequently spreads that the boy and girl are married.

If a woman is unhappy with her husband after a year, she may divorce him. One funny detail I noted was that if a man had been the one to leave a woman, he could try to reconcile with the woman by offering her family yams(!) and other gifts!

For anyone into sign language, here are some tips. In that part of the world, when a boy gave a thumbs-up sign, a girl could answer with a finger on the lips, which 'translated', means 'yes'; a toss of her head means 'no'.

Sigh… One world, many cultures, traditions… When I first heard of this place, I found great pleasure in relating the few details I had garnered to male friends and acquaintances. Every man's eyes lit up as they asked excitedly, "Where is this place? I moving there, boy!" I wonder if they'd change their minds what with the eyebrow/eyelash aspect?

Last year the festival was held during late July and early August. I haven't seen any dates for this year but ladies, if you overhear your guy on the phone with a travel agent…

He might soon 'migrate' and sip on a South Pacific (probably still the Papua New Guinea beer) before he goes out through the bushes, hoping to come into contact with the 'wila' (look it up…lol…it has a close pronunciation to 'wheeler'). Careful you lose him to a woman who gives him a 'katububula' – a garland of flowers known as the Trobriand token of love.

nfpeters3434@gmail.com

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